Sunday, September 19, 2010

shrinking world

Since March of this year, my world has shrunk -- my activity choices are limited. I have to watch each penny because the exchange rate on the US dollar is poor, so that I received at least two hundred dollars less each month than I used to. I cannot always go to church because it's far and consumes a lot of gasoline. Entertainment of any kind is also out, so this has had an isolating element to it that I don't want, but need to accept. I've lowered the child support for DD, but I still need to lower it more. My mother is helping me with the divorce costs and getting the legal child support down to a reasonable level. In all my years overseas I've never been affected this way and receiving a dollar based salary has always been an advantage.

I'm thankful that I don't need much in order to keep me going. I can live on little. On Friday DD asked me for money after having given her more than I can afford to give. I had to speak to her firmly about my situation, though I've mentioned it several times before, but to her it always seems her dad has the ability to pull through every situation, so it's hard for her to conceive that I'm in a real financial hole. However, there's a blessing in disguise in all of this. This financial crisis enabled me to finally establish new boundaries with respect to MDM, something I probably wouldn't have done on my own. God answered my prayer, even though I would have preferred to avoid the crisis if I had had my choice.

Living in a more confined world has it's advantages since I can focus on reading good articles and books without getting distracted by the outside world. I feel like I'm living a desert existence, while teaching me to live on less.

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