The preacher spoke of an ordeal he had gone through where he had lost his voice for a year and proceeded to give numerous examples of how difficult it was for him to have been sidelined like this. His voice rose adamantly as he uttered these next words:
“I had been away from the pulpit for so long... one of the new hostesses did not recognize me – ME the head pastor of the church! Something inside me wanted to scream at her, saying, ‘Hey, don’t you know who I am lady?'”
Towards the end, the old preacher's tone softened as he cheerfully explained how God pulled him through; how God always saves the day for those who love him. Happy ending. Everyone go and eat lunch...
The lesson conveyed turned out to be different from the one intended. No matter. It left me to ponder how fervently blind (not mute) we can be to our own flaws.
~ intuitivefeeling
Showing posts with label Churchianity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Churchianity. Show all posts
Monday, January 24, 2011
Sunday, September 5, 2010
spiritual abuse and lame sermons
I paid a visit to a church today I usually don't attend. Even though it's close by my house I prefer to go farther because .... uuummm, the preacher rubs me the wrong way? Until today, it’s been difficult for me to understand what triggers this allergic reaction since the pastor seems like a nice guy.
Well, the sermon emphasized the importance of hearing God’s voice which I thought was ironic because to me a lot of FOG seemed to be filtering throughout the whole message. I wrote down some of the points that were made for your viewing:
1. The true Christian cannot show sadness in his face because he or she is a child of the light; 2. Grace is granted by God, but it has an expiry date; 3. The Christian must set aside his own plans and commit to God’s plan only; 4. Once the Christian has submitted to God’s plan, then God grants success in the plan that was set aside. 5. The Christian must put aside his or her problems if he or she wants to listen to God.
Is it just me or are these ideas incongruent? They reflect a kind of moralizing reasoning dominated by the Wounded Inner Child; where the wounds seem bigger than God and where the hearer needs to be nagged about duties in order to get his or her act together. To me this does so much damage to children who feel they have no real choice, but to conform to adult expectations.
What also pained me was that the preacher addressed the hearer assuming that he or she:
1) doesn’t want to listen;
2) resists getting involved
3) makes all kinds of excuses in order to not commit to ministry
These are digs that a sensitive soul detects. It’s probably not the speaker's intention, but the gospel message is cross-pollinated with FOG (Fear, Obligation and Guilt Tripping). It teaches the hearer to conform outwardly while denying or minimizing his or her inner conflicts.
“Put on the smile.”
“Help someone in distress.”
“Stop being self-centered.”
To me these subtexts beg the question; Why must inner conflicts be placed as the antithesis (in dichotomy) to listening or to serving God? How can this spiritually fortify the hearer? Doesn't this kind of reasoning reinforce the socialization tactics of the world? Doesn't it reject authentic expression thus constructing a false self that conforms to what others expect (on cue) -- what the hearer SHOULD be doing?
No wonder some people outside the church, view christian communities with caution. When the Wounded Child is not healed, hearers are subjected to external mandates such as learning to smile on cue (if you aren't naturally inclined). This kind of false environment upsets me. The worst part is that the general public silently affirms FOGGY religious assumptions -- week after week.
The preacher also sprinkled some self-importance into the sermon by letting us know that he had breakfast at the same restaurant three times this week while "ministering" to people in his congregation. Why did we need to know that bit of information? How is it related to listening to God? The subtext seemed to be saying, "Look at me, I'm important and the way I show that importance is by having breakfast three times at a nearby restaurant.If you listen to God, then you can have these privileges too."
My thoughts on this post one week later: This journal entry ties well with the post entitled, "The Subconscious Script of the Wounded Child" The preacher is replicating what he was taught by his parent or parents with the difference that he uses the Bible to give authority to his erroneous thoughts.
Well, the sermon emphasized the importance of hearing God’s voice which I thought was ironic because to me a lot of FOG seemed to be filtering throughout the whole message. I wrote down some of the points that were made for your viewing:
1. The true Christian cannot show sadness in his face because he or she is a child of the light; 2. Grace is granted by God, but it has an expiry date; 3. The Christian must set aside his own plans and commit to God’s plan only; 4. Once the Christian has submitted to God’s plan, then God grants success in the plan that was set aside. 5. The Christian must put aside his or her problems if he or she wants to listen to God.
Is it just me or are these ideas incongruent? They reflect a kind of moralizing reasoning dominated by the Wounded Inner Child; where the wounds seem bigger than God and where the hearer needs to be nagged about duties in order to get his or her act together. To me this does so much damage to children who feel they have no real choice, but to conform to adult expectations.
What also pained me was that the preacher addressed the hearer assuming that he or she:
1) doesn’t want to listen;
2) resists getting involved
3) makes all kinds of excuses in order to not commit to ministry
These are digs that a sensitive soul detects. It’s probably not the speaker's intention, but the gospel message is cross-pollinated with FOG (Fear, Obligation and Guilt Tripping). It teaches the hearer to conform outwardly while denying or minimizing his or her inner conflicts.
“Put on the smile.”
“Help someone in distress.”
“Stop being self-centered.”
To me these subtexts beg the question; Why must inner conflicts be placed as the antithesis (in dichotomy) to listening or to serving God? How can this spiritually fortify the hearer? Doesn't this kind of reasoning reinforce the socialization tactics of the world? Doesn't it reject authentic expression thus constructing a false self that conforms to what others expect (on cue) -- what the hearer SHOULD be doing?
No wonder some people outside the church, view christian communities with caution. When the Wounded Child is not healed, hearers are subjected to external mandates such as learning to smile on cue (if you aren't naturally inclined). This kind of false environment upsets me. The worst part is that the general public silently affirms FOGGY religious assumptions -- week after week.
The preacher also sprinkled some self-importance into the sermon by letting us know that he had breakfast at the same restaurant three times this week while "ministering" to people in his congregation. Why did we need to know that bit of information? How is it related to listening to God? The subtext seemed to be saying, "Look at me, I'm important and the way I show that importance is by having breakfast three times at a nearby restaurant.If you listen to God, then you can have these privileges too."
My thoughts on this post one week later: This journal entry ties well with the post entitled, "The Subconscious Script of the Wounded Child" The preacher is replicating what he was taught by his parent or parents with the difference that he uses the Bible to give authority to his erroneous thoughts.
Friday, July 27, 2007
"Christianese"
When I first arrived in Costa Rica, I would stop by a photo copy place quite often and it didn’t take long to figure out that the employees were Christian by the way they talked to each other. They’d use the usual phrases that sound somewhat odd to anybody outside the Church experience.
For example imagine what kind of impact, ¨We’re washed in the blood of the Lamb¨ could make?
Personally, I refrain from using these patterned phrases even when I’m inside the church walls though I respect those who do use them. Anyway, the day I sought to befriend the members of this group (at the copy-machine place), letting them know I was also a Christian, they handed me a Biblical track with a look of unbelief in their eyes. Why? Coz, I didn’t speak their lingo.
David Yeubanks comments, “Most often we are compelled to respond a certain way, feel a certain way, look a certain way, act a certain way – even when that ‘act’ denies what is truly going on inside us. Most of us who have attended Church our whole Christian lives do not really feel free to be openly, blatantly honest about what’s really in our hearts, so we put on smiles, speak in ‘Christianese’ and learn to react to situations and engage in conversations with patterned responses.”
Authenticity is a powerful human connector and positive change agent. Roman 12:9 says that love is to be free of pretense. Sincerity invites people closer, not religious form. I think one great obstacles to God’s message is when we Christians try to show care in a language that we ourselves don’t understand or at least is too vague, but which is ingrained in us. What are these phrases? Like most groups, Christians have a specialized language for those who are truly "in the know".
Before you read any further, I found a cute list of phrases from an Internet site (don’t remember where). Please take in mind that the examples are written tongue-in-cheek and are not intended to offend or mock anyone. Also, the meaning behind each patterned saying is subjective. Many sincere believers use ¨Christianese¨ because they’re not aware it’s patterned or stereotyped, and so perhaps it’s the only way they know how to express their thoughts…
Translation of most common phrases:
Christianese: "If it be God's will."
Translation: "I really don't think God is going to answer this one.
Christianese: "Let's have a word of prayer."
Translation: "I am going to pray for a long, long, long time."
Christianese: "That's not my spiritual gift."
Translation: "Find someone else."
Christianese: "The Lord works in mysterious ways."
Translation: "I'm totally clueless."
Christianese: "Lord willing . . ."
Translation: "You may think I'll be there, but I won't."
Christianese: "I don't feel led."
Translation: "Can't make me."
Christianese: "She has such a sweet spirit!"
Translation: "What an airhead!"
Christianese: "I have a 'check' in my spirit about him."
Translation: "I can't stand that jerk!"
Christianese: "Prayer concerns"
Translation: "Gossip"
Christianese: "In conclusion . . . "
Translation: "I'll be done in another hour or so."
Christianese: "You just have to put it in God's hands."
Translation: "Don't expect me to help you."
Christianese: "God wants to prosper you!"
Translation: "Give me your money."
Ron Hutchcraft explains further by saying,
“Our ‘Christianese’ encourages a person to "accept Christ as your personal Savior." We are so accustomed to the phrase, it seldom occurs to us that such a statement does not even register on the screen of most people. The average person’s concept of "accepting" a person is nowhere near the biblical imperative of putting one’s total trust in Jesus. The word Savior is seldom used in modern conversation and certainly not in a way that clearly communicates what Christ did for us on the Cross. Asking someone to "receive Christ" is also likely to leave the unspoken response, "I have no idea what that means." Many years ago, people spoke of "receiving" a guest, but these days we "receive" a package or a letter. When we ask someone, "Would you like to receive Christ?" he will likely wonder what we mean. To add to the confusion, there are religious traditions where members "receive Christ" every time they partake of the elements of Holy Communion. Some of our most precious faith-words can be misconstrued, misrepresented, and misunderstood. A few years ago a bumper sticker read: "Jesus saves — but Moses invests." While such irreverence makes us wince, it illustrates how confusing our words can be. For many of the people who need Christ most, a call to be "saved" is baffling.”
We need down-to-earth intelligible words to express what is often an intangible spiritual realm. God is the Lord of freshness, rather than patterned speech, often overblown tired phrases that truncate conversation rather than stimulate it. We are meant to be God’s messengers with an unmistakable individuality. May we replace our ‘Christianese” into life giving words that draw us closer to each other rather than isolating each other.
-- Refle
For example imagine what kind of impact, ¨We’re washed in the blood of the Lamb¨ could make?
Personally, I refrain from using these patterned phrases even when I’m inside the church walls though I respect those who do use them. Anyway, the day I sought to befriend the members of this group (at the copy-machine place), letting them know I was also a Christian, they handed me a Biblical track with a look of unbelief in their eyes. Why? Coz, I didn’t speak their lingo.
David Yeubanks comments, “Most often we are compelled to respond a certain way, feel a certain way, look a certain way, act a certain way – even when that ‘act’ denies what is truly going on inside us. Most of us who have attended Church our whole Christian lives do not really feel free to be openly, blatantly honest about what’s really in our hearts, so we put on smiles, speak in ‘Christianese’ and learn to react to situations and engage in conversations with patterned responses.”
Authenticity is a powerful human connector and positive change agent. Roman 12:9 says that love is to be free of pretense. Sincerity invites people closer, not religious form. I think one great obstacles to God’s message is when we Christians try to show care in a language that we ourselves don’t understand or at least is too vague, but which is ingrained in us. What are these phrases? Like most groups, Christians have a specialized language for those who are truly "in the know".
Before you read any further, I found a cute list of phrases from an Internet site (don’t remember where). Please take in mind that the examples are written tongue-in-cheek and are not intended to offend or mock anyone. Also, the meaning behind each patterned saying is subjective. Many sincere believers use ¨Christianese¨ because they’re not aware it’s patterned or stereotyped, and so perhaps it’s the only way they know how to express their thoughts…
Translation of most common phrases:
Christianese: "If it be God's will."
Translation: "I really don't think God is going to answer this one.
Christianese: "Let's have a word of prayer."
Translation: "I am going to pray for a long, long, long time."
Christianese: "That's not my spiritual gift."
Translation: "Find someone else."
Christianese: "The Lord works in mysterious ways."
Translation: "I'm totally clueless."
Christianese: "Lord willing . . ."
Translation: "You may think I'll be there, but I won't."
Christianese: "I don't feel led."
Translation: "Can't make me."
Christianese: "She has such a sweet spirit!"
Translation: "What an airhead!"
Christianese: "I have a 'check' in my spirit about him."
Translation: "I can't stand that jerk!"
Christianese: "Prayer concerns"
Translation: "Gossip"
Christianese: "In conclusion . . . "
Translation: "I'll be done in another hour or so."
Christianese: "You just have to put it in God's hands."
Translation: "Don't expect me to help you."
Christianese: "God wants to prosper you!"
Translation: "Give me your money."
Ron Hutchcraft explains further by saying,
“Our ‘Christianese’ encourages a person to "accept Christ as your personal Savior." We are so accustomed to the phrase, it seldom occurs to us that such a statement does not even register on the screen of most people. The average person’s concept of "accepting" a person is nowhere near the biblical imperative of putting one’s total trust in Jesus. The word Savior is seldom used in modern conversation and certainly not in a way that clearly communicates what Christ did for us on the Cross. Asking someone to "receive Christ" is also likely to leave the unspoken response, "I have no idea what that means." Many years ago, people spoke of "receiving" a guest, but these days we "receive" a package or a letter. When we ask someone, "Would you like to receive Christ?" he will likely wonder what we mean. To add to the confusion, there are religious traditions where members "receive Christ" every time they partake of the elements of Holy Communion. Some of our most precious faith-words can be misconstrued, misrepresented, and misunderstood. A few years ago a bumper sticker read: "Jesus saves — but Moses invests." While such irreverence makes us wince, it illustrates how confusing our words can be. For many of the people who need Christ most, a call to be "saved" is baffling.”
We need down-to-earth intelligible words to express what is often an intangible spiritual realm. God is the Lord of freshness, rather than patterned speech, often overblown tired phrases that truncate conversation rather than stimulate it. We are meant to be God’s messengers with an unmistakable individuality. May we replace our ‘Christianese” into life giving words that draw us closer to each other rather than isolating each other.
-- Refle
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